Record summer temperatures in Russia, epic floods in Pakistan, and tornadoes in Brooklyn. Meaningless to the State of Texas, which has sued the EPA to protect the Lone Star State from any regulations based on the 'flawed' findings of Global Warming.
The Texas Attorney General condemned any federal legislation aimed at containing greenhouse emissions, claiming that the EPA had based its regulation on lies. Oklahoma senator James Inhofe has yet to comment on this initiative by his GOP brethren, as the voters of his state recovered from a long summer of sweltering heat, but rest assured the prime denier of Global Warming will be heard from during the upcoming election season.
Meanwhile snow fell in the lower altitudes of Montana, as the state's GOP announced that they will seek to recriminalize homosexuality. The weather in Delaware was pleasant, despite the Tea Party's candidate for the Senate having declared in previous years that masturbation was adultery and she seeks to outlaw the onanistic sexual deviation. The previous White House administration considered masturbation as more serious threat to America than atheism and funded several groups to combat the perversity without success. Further money was distributed to scientific research into devices to prevent abuse such as penis cooling devices and clitoral dams, however most funds were diverted to continue the practice of circumcision to deny masturbators the extra pleasure from flogging the excess foreskin.
My sinful flesh was cut off without my consent.
The scarring was permanent.
I dream some nights about my amputated foreskin.
Thai hospitals offer an operation to replace the foreskin.
The cost ranges from $10,000 to $50,000 in the States.
I'll keep mine the way it is, unless the GOP decides to control masturbation by castration.
It's only a matter of time.
And that's a fighting word.
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