I Can’t Believe It’s Not Butter

Butter was supplanted by margarine in the 1960s. Ads from the corn council extolled its taste and the supermarkets priced the corn-based spread cheaper than butter. I refused to eat the shit. My mother and father wouldn’t buy butter, so I used the money from my paper route to buy butter. I wouldn’t give any to my sisters or brothers unless they joined the boycott against margarine. My father joined the rebellion after I had him taste mashed potatoes with butter. “It tastes better.” "Because it's real." Wisconsin was the only state in the Union to back my fight and margarine was declared illegal by its legislature. Marlon Brando furthered the cause by spreading butter on his female co-star’s buttocks for the infamous anal entry scene in LAST TANGO IN PARIS. All-purpose butter was spread better than margarine. My brother-in-law, America's leading leisurologist, has long been in accord with my thinking of this subject and sent this email several years ago; Margarine was originally manufactured to fatten turkeys. When it killed the turkeys, the people who had put all the money into the research wanted a payback so they put their heads together to figure out what to do with this product to get their money back. It was a white substance with no food appeal so they added the yellow coloring and sold it to people to use in place of butter. Both have the same amount of calories. Butter is slightly higher in saturated fats at 8 grams; compared to 5 grams for margarine. Eating margarine can increase heart disease in women by 53% over eating the same amount of butter, according to a recent Harvard Medical Study. Eating butter increases the absorption of many other nutrients in other foods. Butter has many nutritional benefits where margarine has a few and only because they are added! Butter tastes much better than margarine and it can enhance the flavours of other foods. Butter has been around for centuries where margarine has been around for less than 100 years . Margarine on the other hand is very High in Trans fatty acids and triples risk of coronary heart disease, increases total cholesterol and LDL (this is the bad cholesterol) and lowers HDL cholesterol, (the good cholesterol), increases the risk of cancers up to five times, lowers quality of breast milk, decreases immune response, decreases insulin response, and here’s the most disturbing fact. Margarine is but ONE MOLECULE away from being PLASTIC and shares 27 ingredients with PAINT The last test. Purchase a tub of margarine and leave it open in your garage or shaded area. Within a couple of days you will notice a couple of things: * no flies, not even those pesky fruit flies will go near it. * It does not rot or smell differently because it has no nutritional value; nothing will grow on it. Even those teeny weeny microorganisms will not a find a home to grow. Why? Because it is nearly plastic. Would you melt your Tupperware and spread that on your toast? And we are what we eat. Margarine sucks.