Running In Place

Mayor Bloomberg has not announced his candidacy for president, but his position as the in the top twenty wealthiest men in America has given him an outside shot as a third party option financed by his own money. In order to gain recognition in the rest of the country the illegally-eleected mayor has waged a campaign against the Occupy Wall Street protestors in order to validate his law and order stance for the right. His position on Israel gives him the Jewish vote as well as the fact that a moehl cut his foreskin in accordance with rabbinical law. Never one to waste an opportunity to further his aspirations, three-time winner of the mayor's office announced that 'NYPD authorities have arrested an alleged al-Qaeda sympathizer in a suspected plot to build a pipe bomb to kill government workers and returning US soldiers.' The suspect had been surveilled by the anti-terror squad of the NYPD, who used a snitch to pay the suspect to pursue his terrorist plans. The SWAT squad raided the apartment of the al-Quada sympathizer, who was in the process of fabricating a match bomb. The police commissioner assured the media that they police had no evidence that the suspect was working with anyone other than their informant. "He appears to be a total lone wolf and he was not part of a larger conspiracy emanating from abroad." Mayor Bloomberg announced from the dais of the press conference. He was wearing an orange cardigan. It did not look very presidential and to my mind's eye the only conspiracy was that of the NYPD sting operation pushing forward a sting operation aimed at netting a secret al-Quada cell that didn't exist except in the heads of the police. Another job well done, Mayor Bloomberg. Terrorizing the people to get votes. It's cheap at half the cost and Mike Bloomberg has the money. It was once yours.