LONGPRONG

One night at the Privilege in Paris I was talking to a Vogue cover girl and said, "My friend really likes you."

"Vonelli?"

"Yes." The bearded art dealer made me laugh and I like that in anyone.

"Not a chance." Brigitte was nicknamed Cruella. She had broken many hearts, but I was immune to her allure. We lived together on the Ile St. Louis. If I fell victim to her succubi, I would be living under a bridge by the Seine.

"That's too bad." My girlfriend was a 16 yo Puerto Rican/French model.

"Why?"

"Because Alan has the biggest penis I've ever seen on a white man."

"Really?"

"A real long prong."

Five minutes later the two of them left the disco as a testament to the power of words quenching desire.

I heard them at it that night and many more.

Neither of them ever mentioned my claim about the Vonelli organ.

As I said I was a good wingman.

Both for women and men.