Thursday, December 27, 2018

Trump's Flushing the Washington Swamp

On August 24, 1814 British troops tried to burn down the new capitol of the United States.

Washington.

A day later a hurricane doused the flames, but that salvation hasn't prevent further attempted cinematic destruction of the city along the Potomac River.

Aliens have destroyed Washington DC in countless movies.

For some unexplained reason science-fiction film makers think Washington DC is a beloved emblem of America. Not everyone shares their opinion.

The traffic sucks and rents are exorbitant. The bars close at 10pm and the town is loaded with free-loading politicians. Still young college graduates fill the ranks of the bureaucracy in hopes of political success and experience. Tourists come to visit the sights.

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The White House.

The Capitol and the two houses of Congress.

The Washington Monument.

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Few people realize that the marble, granite, and bluestone gneiss obleisk was the tallest structure in the world from 1884 to 1889.

Aliens have also had their way with the Monument, but nothing is more dangerous to a democracy than a demagogue.

Donald Trump had campaigned in 2016 on a pledge to close the US-Mexico border, which would be financed by our southern neighbor. The President of Mexico undiplomatically told Trump to 'vete a la mierda' or 'go fuck yourself'. Throughout the ensuing two years #45 has periodically repromised his constituency that the wall will be built to stop illegals from entering Freedomland and this December he rejected signing the federal budget unless $5 billion were added to erect a little over two-hundred miles of steel fence.

The Senate said go fuck yourself and Donald Trump tore up the last page of the finance bill in response to their rejecting his wishes.

The result.

No government except for essential services such as the ICE, the DEA, CIA, NSA, and the Pentagon, except for the Coast Guard. Over 800,000 federal employees were furloughed without pay. All national parks are closed to the public.

The Lincoln Monument remains open for selfies by Trump.

No wall. No government.

Which means we now do not have to pay income taxes, the same way Amazon and Apple pay nothing.

Paradise.

Thank you, Mssr. Trump.

ps you and Congress aren't getting paid either.

Unless it's by Melania's stiletto heels.

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