Beermas Rules

I won a scholarship to Xaverian Brothers High School. I lost it two years later for failing religion. My mother and father were astounded by my F grade until I informed them that my failure was the result of a declaration of non-belief.

"Non-belief in what?"

"I don't believe in God."

My mother was horrified by the thought of my burning in Hell and my father backed her struggle to re-convert their son to the Womb of Jesus. All their attempts were thwarted by my apostasy. My high school girlfriend almost brought back into the fold. We were going to join the Cloth, then I heard Led Zeppelin.

1968.

Since then I've worshipped many idols, but only one has remained true.

Beer.

The one true thing in the world.

Happy Beermas.

The above rules act as a catechism for Beermasians.

But there are no real rules.