Monday, March 26, 2012

One Dead Clown


GW Bush's Vice President got a heart transplant this weekend. The old one had suffered through five coronary failures and Dick Cheney opted to wait over two years for a replacement, since there are too few hearts for too many chests. His doctor says that the new organ should increase the 71 year-old's survival rate, since the ex-VP from Wyoming was in good health. According to the Boston Herald Cheney critics bashed the hell out of the former eminence gris of the Bush regime, saying the heart was “Wasted on a war criminal. Hey Dick how many kids did your lies kill? Thats ok, hell can wait a little longer.” or “surgeons mistakenly transplanted the bleeding heart of a liberal” into the unflinchingly hawkish veep. USA Today reported that Albert Brooks wrote: "Dick Cheney gets new heart! Not to be confused with compassion." Chaney and his family have no idea about the identity of the donor. The Chinese have stopped harvesting the hearts of condemned prisoners. Even Cheney would have to think that was a good idea, but the man has his reputation. Prior to the start of Desert Freedom GW Bush expressed his concern about the potential casualties and asked Dick Cheney for advice.

"Tell them the truth. 5000 Americans, 1,000,000 Iraqis, but add one clown." The VP believed in simple solutions.

"Why?" GW was dumbfounded by the suggestion.

"You'll see." Cheney winked with Wyoming wisdom.

At the next White House press conference the reporters clamored for details on the casualties and GW Bush says, "We estimate that there will be 5000 American dead, 1,000,000 Iraqis, and one clown."

The reporters jumped to their feet and asked, "Why one dead clown?"

GW Bush smiled at Chaney and misquoted HL Mencken under his breath, "Nobody ever went broke misunderestimating the intelligence of the American public."

Dick Cheney could only smile, because only a fool laughed at his own joke. Especially since he had no heart.

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