The Downside of Heaven

A holy man from Bali died from old age. He arrived at the Pearly Gates to be greeted by St. Peter.

“Welcome to Heaven.” St. Peter led the Balinese holy man inside the holy rest home of eternity.

“I thought heaven was only for Christians.”

“No, no, heaven is for everyone. Over there are the Balinese. To the right the French. Back there the Muslims. Up front the Christians. Over there the Irish.” St. Peter pointed out every segment of heaven, then as they walked through a forest of euphoria, St. Peter whispered. “And over there are the Fundamentalists.”

“Why are you whispering?”

“Because they think they’re the only ones up here.”

Read Stanley Elkins THE LIVING END.

In that novel the protagonist is sentenced to Hell for thinking Heaven looks like a Hollywood set from the 1930s.

Now that's cold, even for god.

Solar Flap

The sun has circled the center of the Milky Way about twenty-five times. Each orbit takes about 250 million years at a speed of 250 kilometers per second. The Earth and its companion planets are dragged through the cosmos without protest, although the sun absorbs the blunt of this peregrination through Space and this week a plasma cloud was flayed from the solar surface.

Probably enough energy to power the American SUV fleet through eternity or scorch our celestial home to a charred cinder.

We survived the event and continue our voyage into the heavens.

Where we stop no one knows.

Not even the Baptists.