Thursday, March 3, 2011

Help Spiderman


New York City was awarded the bronze medal as the 4rd Most Polluted City in America. The Gold Medalist was Philadelphia, the City of Brotherly Love. Both cities' pollution ratings were most assuredly determined by their proximity to the rancid state of New Jersey. The vista out my window in Fort Greene is filled by a cloudy overcast harbingering the promised rain for Sunday. No hint of toxicity.

My only ecological footprint is my computer. Maybe $3 of electricity a day. I make an effort to recycle. Subway passengers congratulate my attempts to pick up fast-food trash on the platforms. I don't have a car. No TV too. My main contributions to the End of Times are tri-monthly trans-global flights to Thailand. Enough carbon particles scattered into the highest reaches of the breathable atmosphere to bury a Toyota Prius. in a six-foot grave.

To paraphrase Van Halen from TOO HOT FOR TEACHER, "Funny but New York doesn't feel dirty."

Here's the Top 5 Polluted Cities in America.

No surprises.

No. 5 Baton Rouge, La.
Number of unhealthy air quality days (2009): None
Pounds of on-site toxic releases reported (2009): 33.6 million

No. 4 New York, N.Y.
MSA: New York-Northern New Jersey-Long Island, N.Y./N.J./Pa.
Number of unhealthy air quality days (2009): 5
Pounds of on-site toxic releases reported (2009): 4.1 million
EWG top water concerns: Total haloacetic acids; dieldrin; total trihalomethanes`

No. 3 Fresno, Calif.
Number of unhealthy air quality days (2009): 26
Pounds of on-site toxic releases reported (2009): 338,000
EWG top water concern: Nitrates

No. 2 Bakersfield, Calif.
Number of unhealthy air quality days (2009): 43
Pounds of on-site toxic releases reported (2009): 2.2 million

No. 1 Philadelphia, Pa.
MSA: Philadelphia-Camden-Wilmington, Pa./N.J./Del./Md.
Number of unhealthy air quality days (2009): 2
Pounds of on-site toxic releases reported (2009): 11.3 million
EWG top water concern: Total trihalomethanes

Trihalomethanes, haloacetic acids, and dieldrin sound dangerous, then again we are entering the Age of Dooom.

Drink beer now.

I

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