FIRST LAST THOUGHT

After my birth
I was nothing
I possessed nothing
I felt nothing
Not
Love
Food
Pissing
Shitting
Nothing touched my nothingness
Then I awoke
Underwater
My lungs filled with water
Panic
Around me nothing
I looked up
A hand
I reached up
Two hands touched
I was pulled to the surface
A woman on a raft hugged me
I knew this smell.
I had known it forever
I had created her
The salty water
The beach
People
The woman was beautiful
The woman was my mother
We were at a beach
Higgins Beach
Maine
1953
I coughed water
My mother slapped my back
I was alive
An escapee from the nothingness of infancy
My first thought as a child
I love this
Life
Same as now
Alive always alive
Forever to never
Again.