Showing posts with label new hampshire. Show all posts
Showing posts with label new hampshire. Show all posts

Monday, January 22, 2024

Free As The Breeze - 2016


The Soviet Premier Khrushchev famously declared in 1956 that the USSR would bury American Imperialism.

Actually he said, "Whether you like it or not, history is on our side.", but the Western press liked 'we will bury you' better.

After his election in 1960 President Kennedy was upset by the USSR thinking America was soft and JFK called the American people to improve their health and fitness. His primary challenge was the 50-mile hike. The Marines could accomplish the feat in 20 hours. In February 1963 JFK and his brother walked the distance in the winter.

That following summer at Boy Scout camp in New Hampshire my older brother and I joined a troop of hikers on a 100 mile hike through the forests of the White Mountains. Our scout leaders drove the phalanx of 12-13 year-olds to finish the daily twenty-mile stages. We ran out of food on the second day and pillaged a cornfield for dinner. The 3rd day was a tortuous trudge on a path surrounded by miles of chopped tress. The sun was relentless and the leaders promised us a good swim at the end of the trail.

"Big Man Pond."

"Food and water."

We tramped with the food as first word for the right foot and water for our left.

Food and water built a mirage of Big Man Pond. The crystal clear lake was 30 miles across from shore to shore. Hot dogs and hamburgers were cooking on a BBQ with ice cream sodas to chase them down and a girls' camp was next to our camp site.

The reality came as a shock.

Big Man Pond was barely two hundred feet in length. One of the boys from South Boston threw a rock across it. The troop leader yelled at us.

"Stop your complaining, This pond is spring-fed. That's our water. The food will be here later. We've marched sixty miles in three days. It's time for a swim. You've earned it. Everyone strip off your clothes."

He led the way and was buck-naked with seconds. We joined him without protest.

"Everyone in formation. Now one quick jog around the pond and then in the water."

We followed the troop leader. Our penises bounced up and down. At the starting point he stopped and pointed to the pond.

"Into the water."

We were robots to his command.

It was the first time that I went skinny-dipping, but not the last.

Since that day I have swam naked on Cape Cod, at Watchic Pond, Riis Park in New York, and Black Beach in San Diego.

Nudity was frowned upon by most Americans.

Our Puritan roots deny the freedom of prurient behavior, because to my ancestors a body without clothing was too vulnerable to attack, however the Germans and Scandinavians have a long history of sun-worshipping due to their pagan history.

In 1982 I visited Sylt north of Hamburg. The beach was a center for FKK or Freikoerperkultur 'free body culture'. I stripped off my clothes and to allow the four elements of wind, earth, sun, and water to embrace my flesh. The other bathers bronzed their bodies like gods and goddesses. My friends and I were young. That day we felt immortal.

30 years later sunbathing au natural has fallen out of vogue according to the German FKK association. There are less Germans and more foreigners, who disapprove of the old tradition, plus the Germans of the 80s are in their 50s and 60s.

Our divinity has been devastated by our age. I no longer look at my reflection in the mirror. I prefer looking at my shadow, but last year I quit my job on 47th Street to regain my girlish figure. For the past three days I've been out on the basketball court shooting hoops. I walked around my apartment in the nude. One day and one day soon I'm going to check the mirror and see the shadow of that young man basking in the dying light of a North Sea sunset and say, "Naked as a jaybird."

The same way I came into this life.

Sylt, I'm coming your way.

Achtung, achtung.

The naked man cometh.

Nobody is burying me other than in the sand.

Thursday, August 13, 2020

Boy Scout Shota


In the summer of 1962 my brother and I set out  with a large contingent of fellow Boy Scouts for a Sixty-Mile hike in emulation of JFK's call for a physical resurgence of youthful health. We departed from Adams Pond Camp south of Ossipee, NH and tramped through burnt forests and passed fields filled with tall cornstalks. The only memorable campsite was atop Evans Mountain next to a supposedly haunted house surrounded by blueberry fields.

None of us was older than twelve and the next day the temperature rose into the 90s and the scout masters promised their weakening troops a swim at New England's most beautiful pond. We picked up our pace and ended up a muddy hole rimmed by thirsty cows. The scout leader shooed away the cattle and the oldest adult explained that tradition required a naked run around the pond.

The boys from South of the Charles River rejected this demand.

"Then you get no food tonight."

"Fuck you then," said a Eagle Scout from Southie.

The rebels outnumbered the obedient, but the leaders and their adherents stripped off their clothes to trot around the waterhole.

We went into the pond wearing our shorts.

That night we ate nothing.

The Scout Leaders and their followers sat around a bonfire and ate fried chicken washed down by 'bug juice' or Kool-Aid. None of the rebels joined them. We slept together with the older boys standing guard. 

The next morning we rose before the dawn and trekked to the nearest road.

A farmer in a big truck stopped for us and asked, "Are you boys on that 'hike'?"

"We were," said a boy from Dorchester.

"I thought as much. Jump in the back and I'll drive to Adams Pond." He looked over his shoulder, as if the Boy Scout Leaders might stop him from aiding thirty-plus boys. 

As we approached the camp, the oldest boy from Southie warned, "Don't say nothing. Those motherfuckers will get you or us. I wish we could stop them from hurting our fellow scouts, but no one will believe us. Be prepared."

1962 was almost sixty years ago.

Not yesterday, but I still see the young boys running naked around a dirty pond.

Fuck the Boy Scouts.

ps the last entry in the Boy Scout Handbook was about 'noctural emissions'.

Tuesday, February 9, 2016

Bernie Wins NH

Senator McGovern won one state and the District of Columbia in 1972.

Massachusetts.

A journalist asked a Bostonian why the North Dakotan had carried the Bay State against the Richard Nixon tsunami and the townie said, "As a Bostonian we know a crook, when we see one."

And we know what is right too.

Go Bernie Go.

Saturday, March 21, 2015

The Old Man In The Mountain

The Old Man in the Mountain was first sighted by Europeans in 1805. The craggy profile had been carved by the glaciers of the last Ice Age and sculpted by the centuries of harsh weather crossing the White Mountains. Over the years millions of visitors have traveled up to Profile Lake to view the natural wonder popularized by Daniel Webster's words, "The Old Man was famous largely because of statesman Daniel Webster, a New Hampshire native, who once wrote: "Men hang out their signs indicative of their respective trades; shoe makers hang out a gigantic shoe; jewelers a monster watch, and the dentist hangs out a gold tooth; but up in the Mountains of New Hampshire, God Almighty has hung out a sign to show that there He makes men."

In May of 2003 the stone formation collapsed down Cannon Mountain.

The profile is merely a memory, but has been replaced by the silhouette of Eric Mitchell, star of stage and screen.

Kudos to the new Old Man of the Mountain.

May he grace the skies forever.