Washing Of Hands

The regular MLB season ends tonight with a tiebreaker between old rivals; The New York Yankees and the Boston Red Sox. The night game will be played at Fenway Park, where tradition is eternally tradition and that die-hard honor of men not washing their hands at a baseball park will remain sacrosanct until the last out of eternity.

One survey conducted at the Atlanta Braves stadium revealed that while 95% of female Braves fans washed their hands while only 54% of their male counterpart attempted this ablution.

Someone once told me that at the old Yankee Stadium less than 20% of men put their hands under a faucet after finishing at the urinal. 8000 men out of 40,000 Yankee fans.

After hearing that information I always wash my hands, even if other men think it's effeminate.

Also I never shake anyone's hands at a game and I certainly don't make eye contact.

That is a baseball game no-no.

Unless of course it's someone famous and then you want to see how big they are.

Does that make me gay and do women wash their hands at Fenway?

Washing Hands a Go-Go

Another New York survey revealed that less than 1% of men at Yankee Stadium washed their hands after using the bathroom. Even scarier was that less than 2% did so after squatting on the porcelain throne. Thankfully more than 20% did so after puking cheap hot dogs and worthless Bud beer. Last month I decided to conduct a similar survey in the go-go bars of Pattaya.

This meant drinking a lot of beer, but I was surprised to see that more than 30% of the lager louts attending the exotic dance performances actually washed their hands and I hired the one-armed bathroom attendant from the Carousel Go Go to verify these findings. She later reported that almost 50% of the men washed their hands, then again she earns her living from tips, so she might misrepresent the free-style piss and wash statistics, so as not to lose face with her customers.

Me, I always wash my hands, just because I like cleanliness.

Not washing your hands after peeing is a crime in Singapore and the government has trained special agents to sniff your hands after exiting from the toilets, so wash your hands or else expect a caning.

Only 5 strokes for 1st offense.

Masochists need only apply.

Unwashing of Hands