Showing posts with label heroin. Show all posts
Showing posts with label heroin. Show all posts

Thursday, December 25, 2025

Tennyson Walk – the Isle of Wight 1985

December 1985 Alan Vaughan invited Lizzie Mercier-Descloux and me to the Isle of Wight. My holidays were normally spent with my family in Boston. This would be the first one on which I would be absent from the Christmas table. I phoned my parents and said that I would see them after the New Year and on December 23rd the three of us trained to Les Havre to catch the Southhampton ferry.

We drank wine in Alan’s cabins and then visited the gaming hall. The weather was typically rough for the crossing. At one point a wave lifted the ship’s bow so swiftly that all the players around the 21 table were lifted from their seats and then slammed back down. The croupier called the hand over and the captain advised the gamblers to retire to their cabin. Lizzie and I bid Alan tonight. The tousled hair singer was nominally my girlfriend. We had sex and I huffed a line of heroin. The drug cured my mal de mer. The next morning we docked in the English port of Southhampton.

Another ferry took us across the Solvent to the Isle of Wight. Bob Souter was waiting at the dock and drove us to his house in Ventnor, buying lobsters on the way to eat for lunch. I wasn’t too hungry. Heroin is also a good appetite suppressant. Lizzie and I had our own bedroom. Alan and she played “Mais où Sont Passées les Gazelles?’ her African-influenced hit for Bob’s children. He on piano and she a guitar. They were definitely interested in each other and I gave them free rein that evening. High on smack my bones were invulnerable to jealousy.

Christmas morning was festive with gift-giving and drinks.

Never too early on the Isle of Wight. The weather was temperate and the sun stripped away the clouds. Bob proposed the Tennyson Trail, although in reverse, starting at Alum’s Bay and ending at Carlisbrooke. I stayed off the dope. Nodding out on a long walk would be unfair to my hosts, who would have to carry me to the nearest road. We were joined by Anthony, Bob’s teenage son. He had a crush on Lizzie. She was French same as his mother. Lizzie was pretty in a very continental way. She kissed my cheek, as we sat in the car and said, “I like Alan.”

“Like?” The word had many variances.

“Yes, like.” Her intonation narrowed them to one. She lit a cigarette. They were never far from her touch. “Do you mind?”

“Not at all.” It was the truth. She wanted a lover and I was too wasted to be one. “You two stay here and I’ll go up to London. That work for you?”

“Yes.” Something on her face said that this exchange was gone more smoothly than she had expected, but women are always seeking drama.

It was a beautiful walk under a sormy sky along the chalky cliffs overlooking the plowed field of Atlantic rollers. Alan and Lizzie separated from Bob, Anthony, and I. We laughed at Alan stealing my date. At least Bob and I laughed. Anthony thought it had a chance with the singer.

Never.

It was Alan’s day and on Boxing day they drove me to the ferry. Only one train was running to London. My plane was leaving for JFK that evening. If everything went according to schedule then I would be in Boston tomorrow.

I bought a ticket and Alan carried my bag to the gangway.

“Sorry about this.” His smile was contrite.

“No worries.” I patted my coat. The packet of heroin was still had a few lines left in it. “I’ll find a way to get over it.”

And by the time I arrived in Southhampton the world was cool.

I kicked heroin on the 747. I was no junkie. It was easier than I feared.

The next day my mother was happy to see me and my father was glad to have his second son home. And so was I. Left-over turkey tasted better the next day and no one made apple pie like my mother. It was good to be home.

Wednesday, November 26, 2025

COLD TURKEY john lennon

I like nothing better than left-over turkey for a post-thanksgiving jolt of big bird coma, then John Lennon says it best in COLD TURKEY

Sunday, October 19, 2025

FAMOUS FOR NEVER - ON SALE

A STORY OF FAME AND UNFORTUNE

BY

PETER NOLAN SMITH

Rome wasn't burnt in a day. - James Steele

MANGOZEEN BOOKS 2022

In the 1970s city politicians launched countless projects to stem the tide of 'white flight'. None of the doomed programs achieved their goals and the population of the Lower East Side shriveled from 120,000 to 60,000, never hitting zero, because cheap rents, proximity to the subways, and minimal police presence proved irresistible to malcontents disenchanted with the morality of the Silent Majority War and a diverse smattering of gays, drifters, artists, musicians, and addicts reversed the flow from the smoldering desolation.

Soon stutterers read poetry without ridicule to NYU coeds. Bums squatted derelict buildings without fear of landlords. Teenager girls denied cheerleader destinies were offered opiated ballerina gigs at sordid go-go bars. Graffiti artists painted heaven on toppled walls with spray cans. Hell portrayed itself without any artistic endeavors.

Jean-Michel Basquiat appeared out of nowhere. Andy Warhol recognized the young Haitian's genius. His paintings sampled the history of black as if the icons were sampled by a hip-hop DJ, however his mania was cursed by fame and he said he wish he was nobody like me. Heroin was his pay day. Junkies normally only care about heroin, but Jean-Michel was blessed by an eternal desire to paint through his ever-tragic fame.

I knew Jean-Michel.

He once painted my refrigerator.

FAMOUS FOR NEVER recounts the opposite poles of fame and failure.

I saw him a week before his death.

The summer of 1988 at my apartment.

He left me a gift.

I wished he was still alive, but he emulated Nick Tosches' first line of THE DEVIL AND SONNY LISTON.

"Sonny Liston was a man born to die."

And that is the awful truth

FAMOUS FOR NEVER costs $20 plus $5 shipping

i Order via Venmo - peter smith @Peter-Smith-18

Order via Paypal - pascharay@hotmail.com

Wednesday, January 24, 2024

BAG OF NAILS by Peter Nolan Smith


Throughout the 70s Nickie Barnes ran a Harlem heroin empire under the protection of the Lucchese crime syndicate. His godfather 'Crazy Joe' Gallo helped Barnes create 'the Council' to run the trade north of 125th Street and Barnes earned the nickname 'Mr. Untouchable' for his skill at beating charges and evading arrests. Neither the DEA nor rival gangs could touch him and President Carter ordered his AG to bring down the drug kingpin.

The Feds were too square to catch Mr. Untouchable in a compromising situation, however a blonde-haired NYPD officer with a dirty reputation ensnared the gangster in a dope deal. Johnny Z.

Facing multi-life sentences Nicky Barnes served his time like a man, until he discovered that a council member was seeing his old lady and his investments were being sapped by his friends. He dimed overone-hundred-fifty of his associates as well as his girlfriend and Rudy Giuliani rewarded his snitching with a reduced stretch of thirty-five years.

The NYPD cop instrumental to the bust was given his gold shield and Johnny Z seemed destined for great things.

In the autumn of 1979 a sniper on the corner of 2nd Avenue and 10th Street had shot two pedestrians. One of them dead. A cop had been wounded attempting to batter down the door of the barricaded apartment. The 9th precinct cordoned off two blocks and the precinct captain called for back-up.

I watched the confrontation from the back of the St. Mark's Church. It was a warm day for October and none of us had anything better to do than provide a target to a crazed sniper.

Help came in a black unmarked Chevy.

A tall blonde man in a dark suit got out of the passenger side and he was the mirror image of Clint Eastwood, if the movie star had rattlesnake blood running in his veins.

The nearby officers greeted him with firm handshakes. The captain put his arm around the newcomer's shoulder and then pointed to the sniper's perch.

The tall man pulled out a .38. He checked the cylinder and nodded to the captain.

As he walked away, I asked an officer whom I knew from the restaurant next to the precinct on 5th Street, "Who was that?"

"Johnny Z." The uniformed cop spoke the name with fearful reverence.

I had heard the rumors and followed Bobby Z from a distance. He didn't have to show a badge to get through the police line. All the cops knew who he was.

Standing at the 2nd Avenue Deli the renegade pushed back his blonde hair like he was going on a date.

Twice he looked at his reflection in the deli's windows and then Johnny Z walked to the rear of the building and climbed the fire escape with the agility of an escaped ape

Within seconds he was in the building.

A minute later two shots rang out from the sniper's apartment. A rifle flew from the window. It shattered on the street and Bobby Z waved his hand from the building. His audience applauded his swift work.

Back on the street several officers patted his back, as he headed his car. His glare toward the civilians warned them that they had never seen him. The newspapers never reported the incident.

Someone that cold has enemies and a year later Johnny Z raided a Harlem apartment and shot dead several innocent people. One of them was a grandmother.

The detective protested to his superiors that his informant had given the wrong address.

The media suggested that the killings were an execution.

No one believed a rogue cop and only his previous heroics and numerous line of duty injuries saved him from prison.

Johnny Z's pension couldn't cover his debts, but the NYPD took care of their own and Johnny Z was unofficially employed by various precincts to enforce payments from dealers, gambling halls, brothels, and after-hours clubs. The killer also convinced wrong-thinking cops to maintain the blue wall of silence and his name was spoken by the cops of the 9th Precinct with a hush, as if he were a ghost, but he was no phantom.

In the autumn of 1981 the International on West 25th Street was an after-hours club in the city. I worked the door with Benji, a massive Jamaican street fighter, whose arms were scarred from Trenchtown machete wars.

I thought I was a hard guy just standing close to him. At worst I could take a punch.

The International opened three hours before the legit clubs' closing time. Scottie from the Ritz operated the bar. The registers sucked money like crooked slot machines. By 4am the converted garage was packed with those people not willing to release their hold on the night. Entry cost $10 and drinks in a plastic cup were $5. We paid no taxes. Customers bribed me with cocaine and money. I was rich every night and broke by the next afternoon.

Everyone wanted a piece of the action and the local precinct insisted on a bigger cut from the door.

Arthur the owner thought that $500/night too was generous a donation and stiffed the bagman.

Crooked cops have their own value system and I was nervous about how they would right this situation in their favor.

The next night an unmarked car rolled down the deserted block. I nudged Benji. He recognized the ride.

"Police." The only time on-duty cops cruised this street was to get their pay.

"What we going to do?" A velvet rope offered little protection against the Filth.

We were running an illegal club.

"Are we fucked?"

"This isn't official." Benji read the scene with criminal vision. This Chevy had only one man behind the wheel. "It's worst."

"Worst how?"

"It's Johnny Z. This white boy tougher than a bag of nails." Benji muttered under his breath, as if the ex-cop could read lips. Benji's three-hundred pounds on a 6-2 frame intimidated most white people into crossing the street, especially since he strapped a 45.

Johnny Z got out of the car with the engine running.
"Watch the car," he told Benji. "I don't want no one stealing it."

“Where’s the owner?” Johnny Z asked me, surveying the street without seeing any threat.

"He's inside." I was in no position to lie.

"Show me."

I opened the ropes and went inside the crowded club.

"Let me guess." Johnny Z scanned the room and then said, "The guy in the black suit at the end of the bar."

"That's him." I lifted my hand to warn Arthur.

"Don't be smart." It was the only warning I would get from him.

"Yes, sir. I showed him the way.

"I won't be long." Johnny Z went to the bar and slapped Arthur once. My streetwise boss fell to the floor in a slump.

“500 a night.” Johnny Z helped Arthur to his feet. "You got that? I'll be here every night to make sure I get it too"

"Yes." It was the only right answer.

The extra $500 came from allowing less desirable customers into the club for $20 each. Twenty-five people might not seem many, but these entries proved to be trouble time and time again. Benji and I handled each intruders with force.

Every night Johnny Z watched from the bar with amusement. All he had to do was tell the trouble-makers to leave. None of them ever questioned his command.

Johnny Z was bad news. He had a past, present, and future which he couldn't outrun. He was above the law, but Johnny Z misread the shitstorm coming our way.

The International was hot. The FBI were investigating police corruption. Arthur wore the wire for Internal Affairs. Our partners were Russian counterfeiters. The leader lived with my ex-girlfriend. I was still in love with her. Benji thought I was a fool and so did Johnny Z.

"You." Johnny Z motioned for me to come over to him.

"What's wrong?"

"What's wrong? Are you blind?"

"No." I knew what he was talking about.

"You should get out of here before it's too late to leave."

"What about you?"

"Tonight's my last night. It should be yours too. One more thing. That girl is never coming back to you.

"Thanks."

The truth didn't sound any better coming from a bag of nails.

I gave my notice.

Arthur shrugged like I should have gone long before that.

I left for Paris within the week. I had a job at a nightclub in Les Halles. It was called Les Bains-Douches.

Over the next few months I heard about the International from Scottie. Viktor Malenski's corpse was found outside the club and the FBI raided the premises a day after New Year's Eve. The Special Investigations Unit arrested two bagman for the cops. Johnny Z wasn't one of them. Thirty precinct cops were dismissed without charges. No one was saying who killed Viktor.

I stayed in France for five years.

By 1990 I was out of nightclubs.

A friend, Richie Boy, hired me to work at his diamond exchange.

Part security, part schlepper.

Sleeping regular hours was a treat, although the money wasn't close to what I coined at the International, so in 1995 when Scottie offered a job at his club in Beverly Hills, I accepted without reservation.

A free place to stay, good money, drugs, beautiful women, palm trees, the Pacific Ocean, and a chance to meet a film producer for my stories sounded like a dream come true.

The Milk Bar opened in January of 1995. Its New Yorkishness guaranteed an overnight success.

I met Prince, the husband of the Pakistani president, Mickey Rourke, and a good number of plenty drug dealers. My cocaine use was minute to minute. Our bouncer, Big Bernard, was a skyscraper of a Haitian. His big smile was a calling card to get into films. Everyone in LA was after the same thing.

Fame and fortune.

Bernard was a pussy hound and he had a tendency to disappear inside the club.

Scottie would come out to watch my back.

Beverly Hills was rich and soft, but gangbangers cruised the night looking for ripe targets and we were flush with cash.

Scottie was no gunman.

Neither was I.

One night we were talking about old time at the door, when Scotty's eyes widened in disbelief.

"Damn." Scottie's mild expletive echoed Benji's 'damn' from over a decade ago.

"Let me guess."I didn't have to turn my head. Scottie's voice said everything. "It's Johnny Z."

"In the flesh."

"Damn." I turned around hoping Johnny Z was a mirage, although tipping three hundred plus pounds pounds the ex-cop was more a fleecy cloud. He walked with a limp, which could mean many things, but most of all that I could outrun him if necessary.

"What you looking at?"

While his blonde hair had retreated from his forehead, his voice had not lost the menace

"Nothing." I wasn't saying anything until I had to say something.

"I know both of you." The ragged face came from drinking for more than his health. The pummeled knuickles were the souvenirs of forgotten beatings. He was no pussy cat.

"That might be right." I kept my disatance.

"From where?" he asked with nervous apprehension looking over his shoulder. He suit shined from too many ironings.

Two well-dressed men neared the entrance. They looked like move producers with extraordinarily young skin from a thousand rejuvenation procedures.

"You busted Nicky Barnes," I said the legend.

"I was only small part of the operation." Johnny Z was obviously uncomfortable that his past might track him down. Drug dealers had long memories. "Did you know Nicky?"

"No." Nicky Barnes was before my time.

"Think 1981 we had the International in New York." Scottie had never liked how Johnny Z had sucker-punched his best friend.

"That was a long time ago." The name of that infamous club jolted his memory.

"Not that long ago."

"A lifetime ago," the heavy ex-cop licked his lips, as he said, "I'm looking for work in films as a cop expert. No one out here knows about that shit. They think I'm a decorated cop. I am too, but if they were to find out other things, I'd be screwed."

"So you're asking a favor?" Scottie fished for an edge. Johnny Z might be over the hill, but he had friends here and in New York.

"Yes," he hissed in agreement to whatever we asked of him later.

"Then come on in. Your friends too. Free of charge."

"I'll make good for you." Johnny Z ushered in his friends. They tipped the bartenders with largesse. When he left alone, Johnny Z duked me a c-note.

"Can I ask you a question?"

"Depends."

"You told me to leave before the Feds raided the International. That saved me a lot of trouble. Why you do that?"

"I did that?"

"Sorry, I don't remember you at all."

"I suppose that's a good thing."

"yeah, I guess it is." It wasn't easy being as hard as Johnny Z. Even nails get rusty and I wished him good luck. Scottie and I never saw him again.

Over the years I've read that he's got a good career as a consultant out in Hollywood, but I never collected his favor and I was better off for that, because no matter how out of shape Johnny Z gets, it's always best not to owe anything to a bag of nails.

They have sharp ends.

Friday, July 14, 2023

SOUTH OF MATZATLAN 1975

A traveler stands on Route 15.
All around Bobby BeBadd the Sonoran desert
The hot asphalt
Under his feet.
The sun parching his Gringo skin

Skag soothing his soul
But Bobby wants more
Water
Shade
A cold cerveza
More Culiacan heroin
And Mazatlan.
A coastal city.
He just liked the name.
Mazatlan.
The name sounds like old Aztec magic.
Nahuatal for abundant deer.
He knows nothing of Mazatlan.
it doens't matter what he knows
Mazatlan draws him closer
A senortia's siren.

If Bobby BeBadd was a child he might have be lost,
but there was being no lost here.
Route 15 only went north or south.
Skitting the Pacific
With Mazatlan to south.

Black glassed cars speed by
Buses roll by.
Faces stare out the open windows.
Children wave bye bye.
In the desert only fools stood in the sun
The sun rose higher.
Toasting Bobby's flesh brown.

The color under the Rio Grande.
It was winter in New England.
A wet cold winter in California too.
Here it was hot.
A season unknown to gringos
Where Bobby BeBadd is was where he is.
Two college girls stop for him.
Arizona Plates
Bobby gets in back of the Caprice.
Tina and Lena are going to San Blas for the surf.
The AC felt good.
Being out of the sun felt better.
Bobby Be Badd was only going to Mazatlan.
Only three hours away.
America more distant
With every passing every second.
Freer every mile.

Tina and Lena drop me on the Avenue de Mar.
They say Adios.
Bobby stands on the boardwalk
The Pacific stretching to the forever horizon
The smell of diesel on the salt air.
He crosses the Avenue de Mar Enters a cafe serving food and beer. Bobby sits A young one-armed waitress asks what he wants. "Un Cerveza y un camera."
The cafe is also a hotel.
She smiles.
Her name is Maria. After a frist sip of Coruna
Bobby is home.
Nowhere he has been before.
Someplace of none of his dreams.
Away from the desert
Away from the USA
Away from Wintah
Mazatlan
Mexico.
Viva la Revolution

Wednesday, August 18, 2021

Damaged Done With The Needle In My Arm

After the Viet-Nam War wounded veterans deadened their pain by shooting heroin. It was cheap and available. A knife, a fork, a needle, and a cork was the way Rastas spelled New York, the smack capitol of the USA and the other night my friends were telling me about this opium they smoked in New Jersey.

"Opium?" I haven't seen opium in Thailand for at least fifteen years. "That ain't no opium. That's black tar heroin from Mexico."

"No, it isn't." They were proud of their source and I asked them to show me the shit.

I dipped my finger into the goo.

"Heroin." I knew the difference and I was feeling woozy. "Strong too, but better than that OxyContin shit those crackers are downing to deal with the pain of being nothing or the troops coming home and finding out the VA wants them to pray to God to stop the pain."

"I done Oxys once. It's fucked up." The Jersey boy didn't believe in Pharms. "Two of my friends ODed on that shit and the rest of them are robbing to get that shit. They shot it or snort it."

"And you think that your opium doesn't have it in it?" I don't trust any drugs. Only beer and wine.

"I don't know, you wanna give it a try?"

"No, I'm good." I wish I could have said yes, but I've seen the damaged done back in the 70s and we ain't seen nothing yet.

Thursday, August 5, 2021

You Can't Put Your Arm Around A Memory

In May 1984 I ran into Johnny Thunders in Paris. He was playing at the Gibus club outside Republique. His manager was a German drug dealer. I owed Chris $200 for an 8-ball I had bought in 1982. It hadn't been half-bad.

"You have to pay me." The German thought he was a tough guy. "Or else."

"Fuck off." Paris was my city.

"You think I'm joking."

"No, but fuck off anyway." I had a black gang backing me. The Buffaloes came from the concrete suburbs. Johnny liked that I had told his manager to piss off. "Fucking kraut."

"That's right, you don't owe nothing in Paris for dope you bought in New York." We went to a cafe on the Canal St. Martin. A dealer gave us a couple of bags. The powder was brown. China White was impossible to find in Paris.

I was never friends with Johnny, but I loved YOU CAN'T PUT YOUR ARMS AROUND A MELODY. At dawn we bid each other farewell with a nod. He went his way and I went mine.

Several years later I was saddened to hear of his death in New Orleans. I suspected foul play. Johnny was a cold stone junkie. Nothing could kill him.

Certainly not drugs.

Two years ago I found this posting on Facebook from Patricia Jarozynski.

"Many rumors surround Thunders' death at the St. Peter House in New Orleans, Louisiana in April 1991. He apparently died of drug-related causes, but it has been speculated that it was the result of foul play.

According to the autobiography Lobotomy: Surviving the Ramones, Dee Dee Ramone took a call in New York the next day from Stevie Klasson, Johnny's rhythm guitar player. "They told me that Johnny had gotten mixed up with some bastards... who ripped him off for his methadone supply. They had given him LSD and then murdered him. He had gotten a pretty large supply of methadone in England, so he could travel and stay away from those creeps - the drug dealers, Thunders imitators, and losers like that."

What is known for certain is that Johnny's room (no. 37) was ransacked and most of his possessions were missing (passport, makeup, clothes). Rigor mortis had set in with his body positioned in an unnatural state, described by eyewitnesses as "like a pretzel", underneath a coffee table. Friends and acquaintances acknowledge he had not been using heroin for some time, relying on his methadone prescriptions. The police did not open a criminal investigation.

Singer Willy DeVille, who lived next door to the hotel in which Thunders died, described his death this way:

"I don't know how the word got out that I lived next door, but all of a sudden the phone started ringing and ringing. Rolling Stone was calling, the Village Voice called, his family called, and then his guitar player called. I felt bad for all of them. It was a tragic end, and I mean, he went out in a blaze of glory, ha ha ha, so I thought I might as well make it look real good, you know, out of respect, so I just told everybody that when Johnny died he was laying down on the floor with his guitar in his hands. I made that up. When he came out of the St. Peter's Guest House, rigor mortis had set in to such an extent that his body was in a U shape. When you're laying on the floor in a fetal position, doubled over - well, when the body bag came out, it was in a U. It was pretty awful."

An autopsy was conducted by the New Orleans coroner, but served only to compound the mysteries. According to Thunders' biographer Nina Antonia as posted on the Jungle Records web site, the level of drugs found in his system was not fatal. And according to the book "Rock Bottom: Dark Moments in Music Babylon" by Pamela Des Barres who interviewed Thunders' sister Marion, the autopsy confirmed evidence of advanced leukemia, which would explain the decline in Thunders' appearance in the final year of his life. This also sheds light on the interview in Lech Kowalski's documentary "Born To Lose: The Last Rock and Roll Movie", where Thunders' sister Mary-Ann's husband says, "Only Johnny knew how sick he really was."

In a 1994 Melody Maker interview Thunders' manager Mick Webster described the efforts of his family, "We keep asking the New Orleans police to re-investigate, but they haven't been particularly friendly. They seemed to think that this was just another junkie who had wandered into town and died. They simply weren?t interested." Marion claims that the original police report is largely missing and Webster further explains that the Coroner who conducted the autopsy was fired for falsifying a report in another case.

Thunders was survived by his ex-wife Julie and four children, sons John Genzale, Vito Genzale, Dino Genzale, and daughter Jamie Genzale. His oldest son Vito is serving a prison sentence in the Southport Correctional Facility in New York for drug dealing, having completed a previous sentence in Attica.

Like father like son.

Only these times ain't like the 70s.

Johnny Johnny we miss you now.

To hear YOU CAN'T PUT YOUR ARMS AROUND A MEMORY, please go to the following URL

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bBAujZTTV3o&feature=related

Saturday, September 21, 2013

CHINESE ROCKS - Johnny Thunders and the Heartbreakers


Nothing says 1970s Lower East Side better than Johnny Thunders performing the classic CHINESE ROCKS.

"I'M LIVING ON CHINESE ROCKS. ALL MY BEST THINGS ARE IN HOCK."

He was a legend on the Lower East Side.

"I take smack because I enjoy it. I enjoy all it makes me feel. I don't do it to be in with the in crowd. I can rock out with it."

He was no quitter.

But some of us loved Johnny, because he was the strongest of the weakest.

For a listen to the Heartbreakers' version of Dee Dee Ramone's classic junkie tune, please click on this following URL

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S3gPaSsCAiI

Sunday, January 6, 2013

A Reunion of Bad Boys



That Thursday had been a long day at the diamond exchange. Manny was worried about money and Richie Boy had shown up late shikkah or drunk. His son was our big earner.

“Nice to see you.” His father checked his watch. It was after noon.

“Same for me.” His eyes the color of deviled ham and vodka vapors fuming from his flesh. Last night he had dined with clients. Entertaining customers was tough on the body

“Huh?” Manny at age 80 hears 10% of a normal person. I don’t let him answer the phone.

“Richie needs some OJ.” I used to be Richie Boy’s co-pilot. Nowadays I went home just as his customers wanted to have fun.

“And a bacon and egg sandwich. Don’t forget the cheese.” It was the cure for what ailed him.

“You got it.” I knew how he felt, because I had deja-vued too many mornings in the past. The rest of the day passed as fast as a train being dragged across a swamp by oxen. None of us made a sale and Manny decided to close early for once.

“Thank, Dad.” Richie Boy was very grateful. He had a busy tomorrow. “Two customers for $200,000.” The profit would pay a chunk of our debt and my weekly salary.

We left the store and Richie Boy headed home to his wife. Pillow time was his desired destination. I walked over to Grand Central Terminal for a bowl of oyster stew at the Oyster Bar. The train station was bustling with commuters rushing to their platforms. I turned on the western steps to avoid the rush of suburbanites and caught sight of a spectral apparition amongst the well-fed faces.

The man was gaunt and grey.

His head lowered in a heroin nod.

I stopped in his path, thinking I was seeing the ghost of William Burroughs.

Over the years I had spotted the grey eminence of heroin shuffling across Grand Central Terminal.

The transportation vault was close to where the infamous novelist scored his drugs. He didn't know my name. In fact he knew nothing about me other than we once shared the same affliction, albiet mine was a mere shadow of his colossal addiction. Still he had acknowledged our affiliation with an uplifted finger to his head and for a second I expected the same from the approaching man, except he was not William Burroughs, who had been dead for years.

The phantasm was familiar for another reason.

It was my old friend, Davy. The ex-doorman was younger than me by a decade. He had once been the desire of every gay boy in New York. He now looked twice my age, although just as likely to survive every person in the terminal with a junkie’s determination. I almost let him walk by, then called out his name.

Davy’s yellow teeth gleamed in the half-light of the sunset streaming through the terminal’s cathedral windows.

“Hey.”

“You look good.” I would have said the same about anyone whom I thought was dead.

Davy was happy that I didn’t ask many questions. Even happier that I didn’t ask him if he was holding any dope. I would have loved some. A little smoke would take away the pain of being in New York without my family.

I mentioned a soiree featuring punk rock.

“Emily and Pat are showing their film NIGHTCLUBBING at NYU.” Davy had loved punk rock, but said, “I really don’t go out much anymore.”

“Neither do I.” We had our reasons. His were more believable than mine.

“I have a picture of you, Barney, and Phillip. We look like an old rock band re-uniting for an oldies tour. I’ll send you a copy.”

“I’d like that.” My friend bid me farewell.

I wanted to say that I wouldn’t tell anyone about seeing him, for the mention of his name sets everyone’s heads to shaking with disapproval.

I wasn't ready to throw any stones.

Davy was a bad boy, but I was am glad that he was alive.

There were too few bad boys left on the books and one day I might need to ask him for help, because my days of being a bad boy aren’t over, simply delayed to a time near death.

My wife thinks that date is years away. For my son’s sake I hope she’s right. I wanted to live to 78. Fenway would be 20 then.

And Mem, my wife, only 46.

Ah, youth.

So fleeting and wasted on the young.

Saturday, November 24, 2012

You Can't Put Your Arm Around A Memory


In May 1984 I ran into Johnny Thunders in Paris. He was playing at the Gibus club outside Republique. His manager was a German drug dealer. I owed Chris $200 for an 8-ball I had bought in 1982. It hadn't been half-bad. "You have to pay me." The German thought he was a tough guy. "Or else." "Fuck off." Paris was my city. "You think I'm joking." "No, but fuck off anyway." I had a black gang backing me. The Buffaloes came from the concrete suburbs. Johnny liked that I had told his manager to piss off. "Fucking kraut."

"That's right, you don't owe nothing for New York in Paris." We went to a cafe on the Canal St. Martin. A dealer gave us a couple of bags. The powder was brown. China White was impossible to find in Paris.

I was never friends with Johnny, but I loved YOU CAN'T PUT YOUR ARMS AROUND A MELODY. At dawn we bid each other farewell with a nod. He went his way and I went mine. Several years later I was saddened to hear of his death in New Orleans. I suspected foul play. Johnny was a cold stone junkie. Nothing could kill him. Certainly not drugs.

Two years ago I found this posting on Facebook from Patricia Jarozynski.

"Many rumors surround Thunders' death at the St. Peter House in New Orleans, Louisiana in April 1991. He apparently died of drug-related causes, but it has been speculated that it was the result of foul play. According to the autobiography Lobotomy: Surviving the Ramones, Dee Dee Ramone took a call in New York the next day from Stevie Klasson, Johnny's rhythm guitar player. "They told me that Johnny had gotten mixed up with some bastards... who ripped him off for his methadone supply. They had given him LSD and then murdered him. He had gotten a pretty large supply of methadone in England, so he could travel and stay away from those creeps - the drug dealers, Thunders imitators, and losers like that."

What is known for certain is that Johnny's room (no. 37) was ransacked and most of his possessions were missing (passport, makeup, clothes). Rigor mortis had set in with his body positioned in an unnatural state, described by eyewitnesses as "like a pretzel", underneath a coffee table. Friends and acquaintances acknowledge he had not been using heroin for some time, relying on his methadone prescriptions. The police did not open a criminal investigation.

Singer Willy DeVille, who lived next door to the hotel in which Thunders died, described his death this way:

"I don't know how the word got out that I lived next door, but all of a sudden the phone started ringing and ringing. Rolling Stone was calling, the Village Voice called, his family called, and then his guitar player called. I felt bad for all of them. It was a tragic end, and I mean, he went out in a blaze of glory, ha ha ha, so I thought I might as well make it look real good, you know, out of respect, so I just told everybody that when Johnny died he was laying down on the floor with his guitar in his hands. I made that up. When he came out of the St. Peter's Guest House, rigor mortis had set in to such an extent that his body was in a U shape. When you're laying on the floor in a fetal position, doubled over - well, when the body bag came out, it was in a U. It was pretty awful."

An autopsy was conducted by the New Orleans coroner, but served only to compound the mysteries. According to Thunders' biographer Nina Antonia as posted on the Jungle Records web site, the level of drugs found in his system was not fatal. And according to the book "Rock Bottom: Dark Moments in Music Babylon" by Pamela Des Barres who interviewed Thunders' sister Marion, the autopsy confirmed evidence of advanced leukemia, which would explain the decline in Thunders' appearance in the final year of his life. This also sheds light on the interview in Lech Kowalski's documentary "Born To Lose: The Last Rock and Roll Movie", where Thunders' sister Mary-Ann's husband says, "Only Johnny knew how sick he really was."

In a 1994 Melody Maker interview Thunders' manager Mick Webster described the efforts of his family, "We keep asking the New Orleans police to re-investigate, but they haven’t been particularly friendly. They seemed to think that this was just another junkie who had wandered into town and died. They simply weren’t interested." Marion claims that the original police report is largely missing and Webster further explains that the Coroner who conducted the autopsy was fired for falsifying a report in another case.

Thunders was survived by his ex-wife Julie and four children, sons John Genzale, Vito Genzale, Dino Genzale, and daughter Jamie Genzale. His oldest son Vito is serving a prison sentence in the Southport Correctional Facility in New York for drug dealing, having completed a previous sentence in Attica.

Like father like son.

Only these times ain't like the 70s.

Johnny Johnny we miss you now.

To hear YOU CAN'T PUT YOUR ARMS AROUND A MEMORY, please go to the following URL http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bBAujZTTV3o&feature=related

Tuesday, October 23, 2012

Spaceley John Spaceley

John Spaceley is one of the lost heroes of punk. A friend sent a link to STORY OF A JUNKIE in which John plays Gringo, a desperately cool skateboarding junkie. He was more than that, then again maybe that was all he had to be, but I loved the onetime PUNK MAGAZINE publisher's Jack o Lantern smile. The other day I was standing on the corner of 3rd Avenue and St. Mark's. For almost two decades his portrait on the outer wall of 5 St. Mark's Place welcomed vistors to the East Village. Lech Kowalski, the director of STORY OF A JUNKIE had paid $5000 in 1983 for the mural and John had been paid in pints of beer to pose for the painting. The owner of the building covered the image stating that the wall had commercial value. No one has yet to rent its space. Spaceley was not always nice, one night outside of Dave's Luncheonette he insulted someone's girlfriend. She might have been a TV. Spaceley pushed the boyfriend into the street. The cab knocked him out cold. His dragqueen friend smacked Spaceley with a chain. He didn't stop until John's eye was gone. It's a wonder more of us didn't die back then. John could have turned meaner, but a young girl tells of meeting the coolest skank; "a gangly, tattooed junkie with platinum blonde hair and an eyepatch. Spacely was fascinating to me because he was the former publisher of the notorious Punk magazine, plus he knew Sid Vicious personally. I also liked his spark—a sense of honor among thieves. I remember one afternoon—I haven't thought about this in 20 years—when he recognized me on St. Marks Place and immediately asked me if I could lend him whatever money I had so he could "pay his rent." He promised that if I lent it to him, he would return and panhandle it back for me. In my naiveté (remember, I was only 15), I lent him whatever I had—probably around $10, which was a fortune to me—and waited for him. The amazing thing to me even now is that he did come back. And he panhandled for a couple of hours, until he was able to get just over $5 for me. That was my "adventure" of the day—watching the legendary Spacely panhandle on my behalf. One sunny summer afternoon, Spacely offered to tell me who really killed Sid Vicious's girlfriend—if I'd give him $2 for a beer. So the two of us went to a grimy tavern called the Holiday Cocktail Lounge, I gave him the $2, and he gave me the answer (available upon request—I like knowing who's read this far). And he told me about his own addictions, which he then claimed to have under control. "So you pulled yourself up," I said, thinking of a line from some Talking Heads tune—my whole life was song lyrics back then. "No," he said emphatically, surprising me with his sudden seriousness. "You can't pull yourself up. Someone has to pull you up." John Spaceley was special. Everyone was in his eyes too. To view John Spaceley in STORY OF A JUNKIE, please go to the following URL http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=21uJglN6siA