Living Long Is The Best Revenge

My great-grandaunt Bert lived to 103. Aunt Marge made it to 95. My father hit 89. My family suffers longevity well and at 68 I can still beat some teenagers at basketball, so I suspect that I'm headed for a ripe old years in full control of my diminishing facilities and if so I hope to age much like Rita Levi-Montalcini.

Nine Aprils ago the Italian Senator for Life and Nobel Prize winner celebrated her 100th birthday. She arrived at the event honoring her decades of achievements in an stunning navy-blue dress. The ageless beauty had been banned from academia by Mussolini. T

After the Nazi invasion of 1943 her family fled Rome to Florence, while she discovered the truth about nerve fibers in a bedroom lab hiding from the SS.

Years later Senora Montalcini told her admirers. "Above all, don't fear difficult moments. The best comes from them."

True words,because you never know where the road will lead as long as you stay forever young no matter what your age.

Dif-Tor Heh Smusma

The Masoretic version of the Bible purported that Methuselah achieved the epic age of 969. His name has become synonymous with longevity in the West. No one in modern history has touched his nonacentarian record, although my great-grand aunt Bert lived to 103.

She circled the world in a sailing ship. One port of call was Bangkok. Bert was the first of my family to visit the Siamese capitol, but not the last. Other relatives have reached ripe old ages. My father lived to 90. I expected to hit at least 110 if only because many more Americans are living longer, for wrinklies are becoming the largest growing segment of the population.

Why?

People don't die as much as they used to die.

Once past 30 few people want to live by the James Dean adage 'live fast and die young.

Even morticians don't want to hump fat kids and those ghouls will hump most everything dead.

With that macabre phenomena in mind I'm living as long as possible.

I don't want anyone touching my dead flesh until I'm way pass my prime.

Of course Vulcans like STAR TREK's Mr. Spock live to 300.

LIVE LONG AND PROSPER or Dif-tor heh smusma in Vulcan.

Dif-Tor Heh Smusma

The Masoretic version of the Bible purported that Methuselah achieved the epic age of 969. His name has become synonymous with longevity in the West. No one in modern history has touched his nonacentarian record, although my great-grand aunt Bert lived to 103.

She circled the world in a sailing ship. One port of call was Bangkok. Bert was the first of my family to visit the Siamese capitol, but not the last. Other relatives have reached ripe old ages. My father lived to 90. I expected to hit at least 110 if only because many more Americans are living longer, for wrinklies are becoming the largest growing segment of the population.

Why?

People don't die as much as they used to die.

Once past 30 few people want to live by the James Dean adage 'live fast and die young. Leave a good-looking corpse', especially since most of the young in America aren't attractive after the age of 13.

Even morticians don't want to hump fat kids and those ghouls will hump most everything dead.

With that macabre phenomena in mind I'm living as long as possible.

I don't want anyone touching my dead flesh until I'm way pass my prime.

Of course Vulcans like STAR TREK's Mr. Spock live to 300.

LIVE LONG AND PROSPER or Dif-tor heh smusma in Vulcan.

Live Longer

My family has centagenarians on my father's side. We can eat what we want within reason. Excess in Moderation has been the key to my existence, but now that I'm 60 I have tempered that path with some radical departures from my former carefree joi de vivre; rare bouts of hard alcohol and much more sleep.

I'm aiming at 100,

Not everyone is so lucky with their health, which brings to mind an old joke.

A man goes into the doctor for his annual check-up, expecting the usual grade A report, instead the doctor confronts him with the verdict that he only has 6 months to live.

"Six months?"

"That's all." The doctor is sad because he's losing a friend and good patient.

"Is there anything I can do?" The patient's voice betrays his desperation.

"Well, you can give up sex, drinking, smoke, singing, and drugs."

"Will that make me live longer?'

"No, but it will make the six months seem longer."

555 not really.

The shortness of our mortality is always a buzzkill, but I will continue to live by the words of the classic Grassroots hit, "Let's Live For Today". "Sha na na live for today." To hear this song please go the following URL http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vno9AcXqzt4