The Immaculate Conception of The Blessed Virgin Mary

In the Second Century CE the Holy Mother Mary was introduced into Christian belief in the Gospel Of St. James. The tale of her conception without sex was cobbled together in the Gospel of James from Greek myths and an Old Testament fable Samuel's mother giving birthing without enduring penetration by her infertile husband, Joachim. The Holy Roman Church had promoted this plagirized by declaring that Mary conceived her son without any assistance from Joseph, thus rendering her free of sin unlike the rest of humanity.

As an altar boy in the early 1960s I celebrate thenHoly Day on December 8 before the hometown congregation of St. Elizabeth, who if I remember correctly was Mary's aunt. The nuns tramped us from St. Mary's of the Foothills into the church. The Mass was in Latin and a great mystery to the worshippers ignorant of the dead language. All I understood as 'mea culpa mea culpa, mea maxima culpa' or forgive me three times fast with the last one forgive me a lot'. A covert atheist since the age of eight I mumbled the Latin and sang, 'Oh Mary we crown you with flowers today, queen of the angels. Queen of the May'.

I was good in math and the numbers for the Church were way off. The time between December 8 and Christmas were under a month and most pregnancy lasted nine months, even back in Biblical times. I brought up the discrepancy to my teacher, Sister Mary Magdalene, who subjected me to a palm punishment. Ten slaps of the wooden pointer. As her favorite student she hated the punishment, but the Holy Roman Church had its rules against heresy.

According to Wikipedia The Immaculate Conception went so far as to hold that Anne had conceived Mary by kissing her husband Joachim, and that Anne's father and grandmother had likewise been conceived without sexual intercourse, although Bridget of Sweden (c. 1303–1373) told how Mary herself had revealed to her that Anne and Joachim conceived their daughter through a sexual union which was sinless because it was pure and free of sexual lust. The Greek church regarded the belief as a Roman novelty and the Muslims said nothing. Coupled with the dogma of the Infallibility of the Pope the Immaculate Conception served as a twin weapon against Marxism and the Red Terror of Communism.

My personal hunch is that Mary was impregnated by a Celtic warrior serving with the Roman warriors, thus explaining Jesus' depiction as a white man. Mary lied to her husband about the father, who accepted the claim to prevent being called a cuckold or having Mary stoned as a unfaithful wife. Of course that theory is heresy, however one only punished by excommunication and I exiled myself from the Church decades ago.

Still it was a Holy Day of Obligation and we students got the day off thanks to St. Mary and I will always be beholding to her for that miracle.

I missed the feast for another year.

As I will Christmas. Hail Pagans. Merry Yulemas.

ps In Giotto, Meeting at the Golden Gate, 1304–1306 Mary is portrayed as a twelve year-old.

God knows no bounds in his infallibility.

Sexy Mary

Published Feb 20, 2015.

The Four Books of the New Testament accredit Mary, plain Virgin Mary, as the mother of Jesus, the Messiah worshipped by the Christians. Old Believers highly venerate Mary for the miracle of Immaculate Conception. She professes to have no contact with a male other than the divine intercession of God.

She is the Mother to the Holy Roman Catholic Church for thousands of years.

No one says bad for her other than the Protestants and no one cares about the Baptist doctrine, except the sixteen million adherents to that sect in the USA.

5% of the population denying homage to Mary of Carmen.

That was one her last name.

Another was Mary daughter of Joachim.

Her father was married to St. Anne David. The rich man was unable to conceive a child with his barren wife and fasted in the desert for forty days and forty nights.

The same amount of time the rains fell to fold the world for Noah's Ark.

Angels appeared to announce the blessed birth of Mary.

Another miracle.

Forty days and forty nights.

I have forty days and nights left on my Lental abstinence of beer.

Gratis vino i superstes erit.

The Feast of the Immaculate Conception

The Feast of the Immaculate Conception has been celebrated by the Catholic Church on December 8th since as early as the 5th Century, but does not commemorate the virginal conception of the Blessed Mary. The Feast of the Annunciation marks Virgin Mary getting mystically pregnant without any sex.

A miracle, but I believed as a young boy that Mary had had an affair and came up with a miraculous alibi accepted by her parents.

Unbelievable.

Not to the believers.