One Small Step

The Golden Gate Bridge has been a magnet for suicide since its construction. One person jumps from the legendary span every two weeks. Only one person, a woman has jumped twice. She was successful on the second jump. Up to now there has been no safety net under the bridge, as the operators considered such a measure would detract from the aesthetic beauty of the bridge and possibly threaten its structural integrity, however they recently voted to install such a device from end to end in hopes of losing the dubious title of 'most popular place to commit suicide in the world'.

I've jumped from bridges for fun. Nothing over 40 feet. The Golden Gate Bridge is over 200 feet tall. I'd never jump from that, although I have contemplated suicide occasionally without ever having a real plan as to the method. Guess I'm lucky that way.

Back when I was in high school my friend's mother attempted suicide off the Tobin Bridge in Boston three times. Always on a Friday. Always in the rain. Always at the end of the day. Traffic would back up on the feeder roads for miles, as the police tried to dissuade the woman from taking a fatal plunge. Finally her husband would show up to add his pleas to the rescue, but his appearance triggered a spike in her resolve. She'd take one look at him and jump off the walkway.

The first time she survived the leap. Her family put her into a mental hospital. After many months she would be released under a doctor's supervision. We'd see her in the yard. She seemed normal and then one rainy Friday afternoon she went intown to the Tobin Bridge. Same spot as before. Traffic was snarled in all directions. The police begged her to come down and once her husband appeared, she once more stepped off the bridge.

She survived a second time.

This time she needed a long stay in the hospitals, both for injuries and screwing her head on straight. Months went by before she was released from state care. She seemed normal as before, until another rainy Friday afternoon.

This time she was successful, because she struck a police boat instead of the water.

As far as I know she never left a note.

I walked across the Brooklyn Bridge last Friday. It was a beautiful day. I let the wind wash my soul. All I could do afterward was smile and this is my non-suicide note from that bridge. I live for another day.