Five Things I Love About America

I was born in the USA. Bruce Springsteen sings the line in his hit BORN IN THE USA about fifty times. The Thai go-go girls at Tahitian Queen 1 dance to that song every day. None of them join in the chorus, but the ex-pats on the bar stools chant every word of the refrain to their teary compatriots so far from the Land of the Free.

“Born in the USA.”

While there is a lot I like about the USA, this song is not one of them. I mean Bruce keeps going on and on like he has an early case of Alzheimer’s Disease or that people are so stupid that he had to sing that line 400 times so they got what he was saying.

Anyway here are the five things I love about the USA.

1.) Road trips.

Several years back a friend and I were discussing why he liked his Ferrari. He said it was for the freedom. At the time we were sitting in bumper to bumper traffic on the Verrazano Bridge. The open road is for fast cars and just cruising.

Route 100 in Vermont. Route 25 to 113 in Maine.

Route 1 beyond Ellsworth Maine and south of Homestead FLA.

The PCH anyway there isn’t a city.

Las Vegas-Grand Canyon-Monument Valley-Arches-Capitol Reef-Bryce Canyon-Zion Canyon-Vegas.

The Jones Beach Parkway.

Anyplace in Montana, where the speed limit used to be ‘WHATEVER IS REASONABLE AND PROPER’.

I was zooming on Interstate 90 outside of Billings at 110mph. I passed a semi-trailer and spotted a state trooper. I was left with two choices; step on the brakes or else keep up to speed. I chose the latter, because the former was an admission of guilt.

Montana changed that speed limit due to a class action suit by motorists with shitty cars who said the speed limit was prejudiced against them.

Freedom of expression challenged by those too slow to care.

It’s unAmerican, but then what isn’t these days?

Not #2

2.) Life Liberty and the Pursuit of Happiness.

I was once asked for my philosophy of life.

The question stumped me.

Zen, Nihilism, Materialism?

Not a chance.

Life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.

Especially the latter.

Fun fun fun.

3.) Baseball.

Baseball has been the great American pastime since before the Civil War. The game is played all around the world no matter what the teabags (Brits) think about it. Baseball isn’t half as boring as Cricket although I appreciate the bravery of the infielders’ barehanding the hard-hit ball.

Ouch.

Unfortunately baseball doesn’t get played as much as before. Americans are too fat to round the bases, parents are too scared of weirdos to let their kids out of the house, not that they aren’t a lot of weirdoes in the house too, and lastly people work too much to take off two hours when they could be watching TV.

Not baseball on TV.

Just TV.

I had a baseball glove in Pattaya.

I threw the ball against the garage wall.

I broke every window within 15 feet of the strike zone.

My arm got stronger and I thought about heading to the States and challenging anyone to play.

Batter up and wear your helmet.

4.) Speaking freely.

The First Amendment protects the freedom of speech.

You can say whatever you want in America and this goes against the grain of Fox News who consider the 1st Amendment to mean that you are free to say whatever you want as long as it’s doesn’t mean anything. To do otherwise is treason.

Impeach the president.

“Weakens the troops’ resolve.”

Pull out of Iraq.

“Cut and run.”

Free Sex.

“What about the children?”

The Freedom of Speech deserves to be practiced even if the speaker is talking shit.

So what?

In Germany you can be arrested for flipping the bird.

Not in America.

It’s the national highway salute to bad drivers.

5.) Amnesia.

Americans forget their mistakes faster than any other nation.

Most don’t think we’re in Iraq anymore.

Of course a die-hard group will carry a grudge forever, but most Americans will move on. Life’s too short to worry about bad things.
Let’s have a BBQ.

So enjoy the fireworks and have a real beer.

Not Budweiser.

Dale Earnhardt Jr. abandoned the proud maker of panther piss.

Hopefully it’s be replaced by Stella Artois.

It ain’t American and neither is Heineken, but it don’t matter, because you’re American as long as you’re in America. You might be illegal. You might be foreign born. You might be a 10 generation Yankee like me.

But it’s star and stripes forever no matter what # 45 says.

Even for anarchists like me.

No Freedom Of Speech for Nazis

Last year hundreds of far right extremists gathered in Charlottesville VA to protest the removal of the statue of General Robert E. Lee. The city mayor refused to grant a permit to the various alt-right groups, however the ACLU argued that the ban was an infringement on the 1st Amendment and a judge from the U.S. District Court for the Western District of Virginia gave the go-ahead on grounds that the rally was protected under the 1st Amendment or Freedom of Speech. The Unite the Right claimed the monument to be an historic reminder of the War Between the States, while the counter-protestors argued that the time to eradicate all traces glorifying slavery from the South. The KKK and other White Power radicals held a torch-lit parade reminiscent of the Nazi marches in the 1930s.

The next day turned violent with battles between police and the protestors. The governor declared a state of emergency and the Virginia State Police shut down the streets, but in the afternoon a bigot drove his car into a crowd, killing Heather Heye.

For the most part the police stood and watched the mayhem.

Donald Trump criticized both sides, but infamously said, "There are very fine people on both sides"

A year passed and the far-right has fought in the streets across this nation.

This weekend they issued a call for a rally in front of the White House.

Less than a hundred showed up.

They are not defeated, simply changing their tactics, but the Freedom of Speech was not written into the Constitution to shield hate-mongers.

Resistance is not futile.

YOU BET I WOULD by Peter Nolan Smith

During our 2009 trip through the American Midlands filming Barry Flanagan statues Brock Dundee and I detoured from our route to meet Colonel Rockford Ret. in Iowa City. The three of us began the evening at a sports bar. The bartender had just returned from his third tour in Iraq. We toasted his return with tequila shots. After the third Cuevo Gold Brock Dundee, Rockford, and I stepped outside to smoke a cigarette.

A trio of Bud Lite drinkers were disparaging the President in the alley.

"I don't know how we elected a nigger."

The fattest was leading the hate parade. He looked like he had played second-string linebacker in high school, but this fat boy hadn't touched his toes in years. I clenched my fists. I hadn't seen my family in months. Thailand was on the other side of the world. I was not in a good mood.

"Don't start anything." Rockford grabbed my arm. He was still a hippie. "It's not the place."

"Assholes." I glared at the trio. I was more a punk and repeated the word louder.

This time they had heard me and turned to face us.

"What your problem?" asked the fat boy's friend. His head was shaven to the bone and his body had been morphed into a smaller steroid version of a WWF wrestling wannabe.

"That's no way to talk about the president."

"And why not?"

"John Wayne said it best about JFK," interjected Rockford, whose favorite westerns were EASY RIDER and OLE YELLER.

"And what was that?"

"I didn't vote for him, but he is my president." Brock beat Rockford to the quote, then added, "I might not be American, but I do like John Wayne."

The three of us traded opinions about our favorite John Wayne films. I picked TRUE GRIT and as a director Brock classically voted for John Ford's THE SEARCHERS, while Brock surprised us with his choice.

"WE WERE EXPENDABLE. It's set in the Philippines. A PT boat crew trying to escape the Japs." The old appellations lived long in Iowa.

I watched the three conservatives bunch together like they were discussing a stratagem, then the fat one ranted about having a black Muslim communist illegal alien as president. I clenched my fists, but remembered that I was passing through Iowa City. Tomorrow I would be hundreds of miles away.

I stubbed out my cigarette and walked toward the entrance to the bar. The skinniest of the three was feeling his oats and loudly told to his friends, "This country was founded on Conservative values; church, family, and flag."

"That's it." I stormed over and pointed my finger in his face.

"This country was founded on life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness, so shut the fuck up about 'Conservative values'."

"I can say anything____" The butch muscle boy started to say.

"Do yourself a favor and shut your piehole and I don't want to hear any muttering behind my back either."

I strode inside the bar and ordered a Stella. Brock and Rockford joined me two seconds later. I looked out the door. The three locals were gone from the alley.

"Fuck them."

>"What happened to the Freedom of Speech?" Colonel Rockford was a firm believer in speaking his mind.

"Fuck the Freedom of Speech. It's an amendment to the Constitution." I was more than angry after eight years of hearing Conservatives bullshit about family values. "I'll say what I want and I'll tell anyone to shut up when I want too. That's my Freedom of Speech."

"I don't think that phrasing was guaranteed by the Constitution." Brock politely said and then continued, "And to be truthful this country is very conservative. Look at what happened to your Senator Gary Hart in 1988."

"Gary Hart?" I hadn't thought about the Colorado senator in years.

"Yes, he was the frontrunner for the Democratic nomination in the 1988 election." My British friend's erudite tones had nearby drinkers listening to his every word. "Right up to the moment when the Miami Herald published photos of Donna Rice sitting on his lap."

"On the yacht MONKEY BUSINESS." Colonel Rockford had a good memory for a man in his early-60s.

"Aptly named. The Senator denied there was an 'hanky-panky'. Even his wife said the relationship was innocent."

"The wife is always the last to know." Colonel Rockford signaled the bartender for three more tequilas.

"His poll rankings sunk to the point where he only received 4000 votes in the New Hampshire primary, but if he had said, "Sure I screwed Donna and so would you all, Gary Hart would have received every male and free love vote in America, because people here and in the rest of the world are sinners. Not Conservative, but fun-loving happiness seekers. But no one likes a liar other than those people who don't want to look at themselves in a mirror."

We picked up our shots and Brock said, "America may be Conservative, but most Americans thought that Gary Hart's indiscretion had little to do with his ability to be president."

"And they got Dukakis to run against Bush." I remembered the photo of Dukakis' head sticking out of a tank like a turtle, then again he would have looked just as silly with Donna Rice on his lap.

"Now that was one unsexy guy." Colonel Rockford shivered with the memory of that election. "I voted Communist that year. Gus Hall I think. And he was even more unsexy. You're right, Brock. All Gary Hart had to have done was say, "I fucked her and so would you." and he would have been president."

"Who was Donna Rice," the bartender asked with interest.

"She was a hot blonde."

Unlike John Wayne movies the three of us were in complete agreement on that subject.

And agreeing with your friends was the beauty of Free Speech.

The Unfreedom of Speech

Freedom of Speech is protected by the 1st Amendment of the US Constitution.

"Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the Government for a redress of grievances."

This right has been besieged by politicians, church leaders, big business, and the military without respite. Anti-war activists were jailed during World War I under the Alien and Sedition Act and the Supreme Court has ruled that there are special exceptions to Free Speech such as 'fighting words', obscenity, imminent lawless action, and several other infringements on the public safety, however the off-limit for any American is any questions on the sovereignty of Israel.

This past summer White House reporter Helen Thomas was ostracized by the media and White House for her comments on RabbiLive.com

Here is a transcript of that interview;

Nesenoff: Any comments on Israel? We're asking everybody today, any comments on Israel?

Thomas: Tell them to get the hell out of Palestine.

Nesenoff: Oooh. Any better comments on Israel?

Thomas: Remember, these people are occupied and it's their land. It's not German, it's not Poland ...

Nesenoff: So where should they go, what should they do?

Thomas: They go home.

Nesenoff: Where's the home?

Thomas: Poland, Germany and America and everywhere else[55]

Nesenoff: So you're saying the Jews go back to Poland and Germany?

Thomas: And America and everywhere else. Why push people out of there who have lived there for centuries? See?

Helen Thomas was exiled from the White House press corp for her speaking her mind, proving that free speech does not apply to the State of Israel. She issued an apology to quell the firestorm, but later confessed, "I paid a price, but it's worth it to speak the truth"

And in December Helen Thomas had the audacity to reiterate her earlier comments by saying at a conference centered on Arab Perception, "Congress, the White House and Hollywood, Wall Street are owned by Zionists. No question, in my opinion."

These words earned the old lady more outrage and an accusation of anti-Semiticism, even though her bloodline is Arab ie Semitic.

Here's to Free Speech and Helen Thomas.

She says what she says and damn those who don't want her to say it.

Free Palestine.

YOU BET I WOULD by Peter Nolan Smith

During my 2009 trip through the American Midlands filming Barry Flanagan statues for my British friend's film the two of us detoured from our route to meet Colonel Rockford Ret. in Iowa City. We began the evening drinking at a sports bar. The bartender was just back from his third tour in Iraq. We toasted his return with tequila shots. After the third Brock Dundee, Rockford, and I stepped outside to smoke a cigarette. A trio of Bud Lite drinkers were disparaging the President in the alley. "I don't know how we elected a nigger." The fattest was leading the hate parade. He looked like he had played second-string linebacker in high school. I clenched my fists. Brock was alarmed by this. My fuse was short these days. I hadn't seen my family in months. Thailand was on the other side of the world. "Don't start anything." Rockford grabbed my arm. "It's not the place." "Assholes." I glared at the trio. They had heard me. I turned to my friends. "John Wayne said it best about JFK." "I didn't vote for him, but he is my president." Brock beat me to the punchline. "I might not be American, but I do like John Wayne." The three of us traded opinions about our favorite John Wayne films. I picked TRUE GRIT and Brock classically voted for John Ford's THE SEARCHERS, while Brock surprised us with his choice. "WE WERE EXPENDABLE. It's set in the Philippines. A PT boat crew trying to escape the Japs." The old appellations lived long in Iowa. I let the three locals vent their frustration at having a black Muslim communist illegal alien as president. I stubbed out my cigarette and walked toward the entrance to the bar. The skinniest of the three was feeling his oats and boasted to his friends, "This country was founded on Conservative values; church, family, and flag." "That's it." I stormed over and pointed my finger in his face. "This country was founded on life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness, so shut the fuck up about 'Conservative values'."

"I can say anything____" The oldest started to say, then thought better of challenging my edict. "Good idea to shut your hole and I don't want to hear any muttering either." I walked inside the bar and ordered a Stella. I hated Bud Lite. Brock and Rockford joined me two seconds later. I looked out the door. The three locals were gone from the alley. >"What about the Freedom of Speech?" Colonel Rockford was a firm believer in speaking your mind.

"Fuck the Freedom of Speech. It's an amendment to the Constitution." I was more than angry after eight years of hearing Conservatives bullshit about family values. "I'll say what I want and I'll tell anyone to shut up when I want too. That's my Freedom of Speech."

"I don't think that phrasing was guaranteed by the Constitution." My Brock politely interjected and then added, "And to be truthful this country is very conservative. Look at what happened to your Senator Gary Hart in 1988."

"Gary Hart?" I hadn't thought about the Colorado senator in years.

"Yes, he was the frontrunner for the Democratic nomination in the 1988 election." My British friend's erudite tones had nearby drinkers listening to his every word. "Right up to the moment when the Miami Herald published photos of Donna Rice sitting on his lap."

"On the yacht MONKEY BUSINESS." Colonel Rockford had a good memory for a man in his early-60s.

"Aptly named. The Senator denied there was an 'hanky-panky'. Even his wife said the relationship was innocent."

"The wife is always the last to know." Colonel Rockford signaled the bartender for tequila.

"His poll rankings sunk to the point where he only received 4000 votes in the New Hampshire primary, but if he had said, "Sure I screwed Donna and so would you all, Gary Hart would have received every male vote and free love vote in America, because people here and in the rest of the world are sinners. Not Conservative, but fun-loving happiness seekers. But no one likes a liar other than those people who don't want to look at themselves in a mirror."

We returned to our drinks and Brock said, "America may be Conservative, but most Americans thought that Gary Hart's indiscretion had little to do with his ability to be president."

"And they got Dukakis to run against Bush." I remembered the photo of Dukakis' head sticking out of a tank. He would have looked just as silly with Donna Rice on his lap.

"Now that was one unsexy guy." Colonel Rockford shivered with the memory of that election. "I voted Communist that year. Gus Hall I think. And he was even more unsexy. You're right, Brock. All Gary Hart had to have done was say, "I fucked her and so would you." and he would have been president." "Who was Donna Rice." "She was a hot blonde." Unlike John Wayne movies the three of us were in complete agreement on that subject. And that's the beauty of Free Speech. Agreeing with your friends.