Friday, July 10, 2009

Leasing vs. Purchasing

My brother-in-law sent this over the Internet

The math on the Paul McCartney-Heather Mills divorce is as follows:

After 5 years of marriage, he paid her $49 million. Assuming he got sex every
night during their 5 year relationship (which would NOT have happened!) it ended up costing him $26,849 per time.

This is Heather.

On the other hand, Elliot Spitzer's call girl, Kristen, an absolute stunner with a body like no other, charges $4,000 an hour. For anything!

This is Kristen.


Had Paul McCartney 'employed' Kristen for 5 years, he would've paid $7.3 million
or an hour of sex every night for 5 years (a saving of $41.7 million). Value-added benefits are: a 22 year old hot babe, no begging, no coaxing, never a headache,
plays all requests, ability to put BOTH legs around you (!!!), no bitching and complaining or 'to do' lists. Best of all, she leaves when you're done, and comes back when you ask her.

All at 1/7th the cost, with no legal fees.

Sometimes renting just makes far more sense.

The GOP would have suggested 'abstinence' without asking questions of their membership, so a more economical option would be to rent a Thai go-go girl for the night. $100/night. A different one every night. Five years @ $100/night comes to about $200,000 with a little menage a trois thrown into the fix.


That's a savings of $48,800,000.

Real money in tough times, but then Paul McCartney isn't me.

One late afternoon in the Hamptons we had quit the break for the day. Beers, fire, joints in the dunes. All legit. We posed for a photo in our wetsuits. A British voice shouted out, "Don't point that camera this way."

"We're not taking a photo of you." I shouted to the middle-aged couple at the hightide mark. "So piss off."

My friends laughed at me and I said, "What?"

"You just told Paul McCartney to piss off." Richie Boy toasted me with a beer.

"Paul McCartney?" I'm seriously near-sighted and squinted at the couple wandering away from us. The woman was his wife, Linda. Rolling Stone critiqued a Wings album with a single sentence.

"Linda McCartney has the nicest tits in rock."

It was a sexist thing to say and I felt bad about telling her to 'piss off' but not Paul McCartney. He's a prat.

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