Sunday, February 1, 2009

Bang a Bong


Michael Phelps, an eight-time gold medalist for the USA, has had photos of his huffing a bong pipe published in the daily scandal sheets. Needless to say the accompanying criticism has been harsh ranging from the WHAT A DOPE banner in England's prestigious NEWS OF THE WORLD to accusations of tossing his career down the tubes for a hit of weed. Even worse were the commentaries from witnesses to his partying such as;

“He didn’t know many people so you’d think he’d be a little shy. But he was loud, obnoxious and slamming beers from the get-go.

“Every girl wanted a piece of him and every guy wanted to be his best buddy. He couldn’t get enough of all the attention.”

“You could tell Michael had smoked before. He grabbed the bong and a lighter and knew exactly what to do.

“He looked just as natural with a bong in his hands as he does swimming in the pool. He was the gold medal winner of bong hits. Michael ended up getting a little paranoid, though, because before too long he looked like he was nervous and ran out of the place.”

Mr. Phelps probably realized that this episode would earn him a rough time from the media along with his coaches and family.

"What were you thinking?"

Mr. Phelps was thinking the same thing most potheads think. "Legalize the weed. fuck the law. Let's party."

The rest of the world simply isn't that cool.

The USA government sent the comedian Tommy Chong to prison for a bong.

Fuck the DEA.

Right on, Aquaman.

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